Naptime Blog

I recently learned that my 9 year old has a girlfriend. I have mixed emotions about the whole thing. I ‘guess’ it’s normal to have a little crush in the 4th grade. I heard my son and his little friends talking about it and I didn’t pay much attention to it. Well, my husband went to his school last week for an awards ceremony and he saw the little girlfriend at the program. It was really funny, because my son was super embarrassed.
 
When the little girl’s mother realized who my husband was she came over to say “hello”. She said her daughter has had a crush on Jeromy for a few years now. “WHAT”!!!!

I am not sure if I am ready for this phase. He wants a cell phone too!! A cell phone and a girlfriend, that’s too much for mommy. He is a handsome little devil, if I must say so myself! Lol

You guys keep me in your prayers during this difficult time. LOL

~Shanta

It’s that time of the school year again, “Science Project” time. I have to say as a mother, I dread this time of the school year. As a teacher, you would think this would be a piece of cake, NOT!

My son usually comes home clueless about he needs to do. His instructions are very vague and the topics are out of this world for 4th graders. I have a hard time with the kids not getting much guidance on what is required and the kids are allowed to pick ANYTHING they want off of a list of 100 various project.

We are doing something with “light bulbs”, not sure what, but “light bulbs”. If our project comes together nicely, I will share pictures later.

 Moms, please pray my strength and patience on this one…

~Shanta

I am still not sure how I feel about the phone call that I got from the Principal last week.  I mean I am proud of my daughter for sticking up for herself and not allowing anyone to get away with touching her, but I do not like that my child feels that it is okay to hit another child.  Let me backtrack a bit.

When the Principal called at 1 PM last Tuesday, I thought it was the nurse calling to tell me Juliana was not feeling well.  When I heard the Principal’s voice, I thought it might be about the website that I have been managing for the past two years for the school.  Instead, I heard “Juliana hit a little boy in the schoolyard today”.  WHAT?  I would have liked to say “You have the wrong child”, but first of all, the school is small and the Principal knows all the children personally by name, and second, I loathe when parents deny that their child could do no wrong. So I sat there and listened while she told me the story.

I learned that the children were playing during recess, and one of the boys tagged her on the shoulder.  Another boy squeezed her in the breast area.  Although my daughter is too young to have developed anything in that area, I have been adamant about teaching her that she should never allow anyone to touch her in her private areas, and that area was of course a private area.

I am not sure if it was sheer reflex, but turns out my daughter hauled off and punched the little boy in the jaw saying “You are not supposed to touch a girl like that!”  The boy started crying and his lip bled.  They were both called to the principal’s office, he admitted what he did and apologized, the principal told my daughter that she should have called the lunch mother, and told both of them that no one should be touching anyone’s private areas.  The principal called the boy’s mom and then called me, and told me that although she did not tell Juliana outright, she is proud that Juliana knows to never let someone touch her and that she defended herself. 

I, on the other hand, cannot believe my daughter hit another child!  I have never been in a fight and would never have hit anyone else, although there have been times in my life when I WISH I would have!  I would have preferred that she went to the lunch mother as well, and did not condone the hitting.

The one thing I wanted my daughter to clarify to me was “Are you sure he didn’t touch you by accident?”  And Juliana explained to me that the boy not only touched her, he pinched her in that area and twisted!  Not only was she defending herself from a boy touching her where he had no right to touch her, she was also probably embarrassed that he did this, and maybe he even hurt her! 

My husband and I did sit her down that evening to have a talk with her.  I needed to stress that hitting is not something we will allow.  I reminded her that she needs to go to a trusted adult if anyone ever hurts her or does something wrong to her.  I told her that I never want another call from the Principal saying that Juliana hit anyone ever again.
When she went to bed later that night, I told my husband that I was secretly very proud of my daughter for sticking up for herself.  I know that I never had the guts to do that when I was younger, and although I meant what I said about never wanting to hear that my daughter hit another child, I am very happy she has proven that she will not allow anyone to hurt her or touch her inappropriately.  And I hope the little boy learned his lesson as well! 

Jennifer
Wife to Paul, Mom to Juliana (7), Anthony and Louis (1) and Joseph (2 months)
www.nevaland.com

A new baby started at daycare, it has been so rough on Tristan. I am not sure how to get him out of his funk. For the first time ever I am rethinking my decision to be a working mother. I feel so bad about his personal stress. The first day the new baby was there Tristan sat on the floor at daycare and cried and nothing calmed him down. He was not hysterical it was just a whimpering with big crocodile tears. I left work early to pick him up and he didn’t leave my lap all night. Every morning we walk into daycare and Tristan runs over and hugs Mrs. Cora, then sometimes he snuggles or he goes and plays. The day after the new baby started he did not want Mrs. Cora and sat by himself, I felt so bad leaving him. Today is day three and Cora said he is more involved again. I hope this means his sleep gets better. Every night since the new baby started he has been having nightmares and he wakes up shaking and crying so I moved him back in bed with me. 

I think adding to his personal drama is the fact that Cora rearranged the play areas at daycare to accommodate the older children (2-4 years old) that she follows a curriculum with. Tristan does not like the new set up, I think he may be going through an object permanence stage. I hope all of this gets better so I can sleep again and Tristan is not so sad and stressed.

-Chrystal

I am amazed with how well my daughter reads now. Her writing is pretty good, too.  I am so proud of how she can express her thoughts in writing…  I think writing is a huge tool for helping with your feelings, understanding your thoughts, and keeping memories.  And the intellectual ability of my little girl is really developing!  It is much easier to have a conversation with her now and having her understand it.  Of course there are still things I need to censor for her, and certain topics that I need to cushion.  And there are definitely topics I think she is still too young for. But my little girl is really turning into a young lady.

Juliana recently started second grade.  As Catholics, she will be receiving two sacraments this school year.  In January she will receive First Penance, and in May she will receive First Holy Communion.  She wants to play basketball in the winter (she played intramurals to learn the basics last year), hoping she makes the girls team.  She intends to continue playing softball in the spring as well.  The new thing Juliana wants to try this year is Girl Scouts, and I am all for it.  She is a very well rounded kid, and I am happy that basketball and softball are in separate seasons, so it would only be one sport at a time and a Girl Scout meeting twice a month.  I believe in after-school activities, however, I do not think our kids should be overwhelmed with a different activity a day.  They should be allowed time after school to express their own creativity by doing their own things such as pursuing writing, crafting, using their minds to create things, etc.  That doesn’t mean that in my house it is NOT a constant battle to turn off the television or the video games! 

Last year, Juliana’s bed time was at 8:30.  This year, she is upset because her friends get to stay up until 9:00.  Basically, the way things work out nightly, by the time she is done showering and getting into her pajamas, taking her allergy medication, giving us all her goodnight kisses, it is RARELY 8:30 anyway!  But it is important for her to be up on time each morning to make the bus, or else it is going to be very difficult for my husband or I to drive her in to school.  So I made a deal with her that if she can wake up without any issues on time and get ready without a fight for a week I would consider making her bedtime 9pm.   The first three mornings were GREAT.  Then we got into a little issue on the fourth morning with running late and not wanting to wake up.  But the fifth morning she did well again.  So I am sure I will get called on my end of the deal one night this week and I will have to start the new bed time.  But if it is going to be a problem, back to 8:30 it goes!  Or maybe I should do 8:45 for a month or so and see if that works.  Although I don’t think she would agree to the compromise!

So my seven year old is getting so big so fast.  My first baby is becoming a little lady, and I am thrilled to say that even with all the bumps along the way (she is developing the attitude of a teenager already at times!), she is really becoming a beautiful little lady!

Jennifer
Mom to Juliana (7), Louis (1) and Anthony (1)
Expecting #4 in September!
www.nevaland.com

Flu season is in full effect. My oldest son’s school sent home a notice that our local health department is offering free flu shots to all school aged children. The local news mentions something about it every single day. I have many concerns about all these new vaccinations. I am school teacher and I think every single germ floats around my school on a daily basis. The news says that seniors and young children have a greater risk.  I am pretty sure that I am in that at-risk population because of my profession.

Our 8 mo. old has already had a large amount of shots. I don’t know how I feel about him getting 2 additional ones this season. I think I am ok with the normal flu shot that is given every year, but I am unsure about the new H1N1 vaccine. I do not want anyone to get sick and suffer during this horrible flu season, but I do not know enough information about the new vaccines to make a good decision for my family.

We do make sure everyone is practicing good hand-washing. We also dress appropriately for the weather. Is your family getting the vaccine? What are your feelings about this scary flu season?

~Shanta

I have mentioned before that I am a sucker for an infomercial!!  Every time the Your Baby Can Read infomercial comes on, I become glued to the T.V. With having a new baby in the house, I am anxious to try anything that will help him develop ALL his skills.

He is a very social baby and curious of the world around him. I was a bit apprehensive w/ the program because of the $$cost$$. Luckily granddaddy was more than willing to invest in the program for his big boy.

It comes w/ a series of videos and supporting flash cards. We have only been watching the 1st video for a few weeks now; I will be recording and documenting the process. I will give you all the down low on how it worked for us.

Have any of you tried it and had success??

http://www.yourbabycanread.com/

~Shanta

Well moms & dads, it’s about that time. This summer has flown by! My son Jeromy is headed to the 4th grade and I am working with 1st & 2nd graders this year. I am very excited about the up coming school year. I work with students with disabilities. I have busted my but over the summer break trying to finish up my Masters degree. It is very difficult being a mom, work outside the home & a full time student.

I often worry, will the stress of my job leave any patience to help my own son out with his homework. I love my career and working with the students that I serve but, some days are tougher than others.

I now know what its like to juggle family & career, and it’s NO cake walk.

Jeromy does pretty well in school with his academic work, I guess his #1 problem, is that BIG mouth he has. Hopefully as he gets older and matures a little, the talking will calm down. (I hope)

How do you all manage your careers and family time effectively??

~Shanta

Our children range in age from 18 to 10 months (and I am pregnant again).  Although the 18 year old is not mine, it gives my husband some advantage over having raised a child already and having gone through high school, the teen years, driving, dating and other lovely things.  As for me, I have just recently begun all of this.  My daughter is 7, and at the end of her first grade year.

I had her in a small private nursery program a few hours a week when she was three and a public universal pre-k program when she was four.    I put her in Catholic school for Kindergarten.  It became immediately apparent during the first week of kindergarten that there are different cliques of moms, most of them I never desired to be any part of.  At the time, I was working part time as a social worker/therapist at a foster care agency, so my time at the school was very rare.  I would drop my daughter off in the morning and pick her up at the after school program at 5:30.  I very rarely dealt with any of the other parents, except the handful I had known prior to enrolling her (as we are parishioners of the church associated with the school).  It did not bother me, with the exception that I would have loved to be more involved for my daughter’s sake, but due to my hectic work schedule this was not possible.

Whenever I would get the chance to pick her up at dismissal, it was evident that all the mothers would gather on one corner or the next as they waited for their children in different groups.  As I walked past each group to get to the entrance of the school, I would pick up bits of conversation:  all sounding like cackling hens.  And this was something I was proud NOT to be a part of.

My twins were born last July.  Since then, I have remained a SAHM.  Since the beginning of this school year, I had wanted to be more involved with my daughter’s education, and made it a point to be at the school every day with the double stroller awaiting dismissal.  I would be amazed with the mothers…  some mothers who had known me from the neighborhood for years would run up to me (when they were alone) to take a look at the babies and want to know all about them.  Those same mothers, when in their “clique”, wouldn’t even give me a second glance.  Often I would sit there with the stroller and talk to some of the grandmothers, because I didn’t want to involve myself with any of these cackling hens.  But it was also apparent that by October, if I wasn’t in a clique, I wasn’t going to be welcomed in one any longer.  It didn’t bother me!

I became friends with the mom of my best friend’s daughter, and we would set up play dates, chat with each other, catch up on the “ins and outs” of first grade, and weed through the rumors either one of us had picked up along the way.  No one has secrets when they stand outside of school with the other hens…  I heard so much ‘dirty laundry’ it was unbelievable.

The only negative to not being part of any of the cliques is that I am not privy to being chosen as a volunteer for school events, such as the Halloween party, the Easter Bunny breakfast, the Christmas fair, the school play, the Card Party, and more.  The moms who run the PTA board are the heads of the cliques, and despite many emails and notes sent to school that I was available to help out, because I was a “nobody” to these women, I would get overlooked and one of their own would be chosen before me (or any other mom who wasn’t in the ‘in-crowd’).

Last night was the Card Party… talk about cackling hens!  I sat there (losing a lot of money on the raffles, by the way!) looking at the women running the event, and how I have heard over and over again from other moms like me how they have tried to ask to help out and were never called either, and I could not believe that these moms could actually be this way!  What message are they sending to their children?

I could offer a lot to the committees:  I am very arts and crafty, I would be happy to wrap gifts or shop or even decorate or clean up!  But it is their loss, and they can bask in this glory they are enjoying while it lasts.  Because I opened up my daughter’s school folder today and read a letter from the principal asking for nominations for the PTA board, as their two year terms have expired.  And I am hoping that there are more moms like me who will be voting a new board in for the next school year with new parents who will bring with them a breath of fresh air!

Jennifer
Mom to Juliana (7), Louis (9m) and Anthony (9m)
Expecting #4 in September!
www.nevaland.com

I can’t believe that the school year is almost over. My oldest son Jeromy is preparing for his 3rd grade End of Grade Tests (in NC we call it the E.O.G.’s). I have mixed emotions about these tests. Jeromy is a pretty good student. He reads above grade level but has to work a little harder at his math. I think our biggest obstacle thus far has been multiplication. It didn’t help very much that our newest family member Jayce decided to join us right around the time Jeromy started his multiplication tables!!!

I definitely needed a refresher multiplication lesson . As much as teachers and parents/guardians try to prepare the students for the E.O.G.’s, there is still a lot of anxiety. Jeromy had 2 tests, reading & math. At the 3rd grade level the students must pass both E.O.G.’s to advance to the 4th grade. The morning of Jeromy’s 1st test, he was obviously nervous and concerned. My husband & I tried to do everything we could to calm his nerves, we even said a little prayer before he went out to catch the bus.

Thank goodness by the end of the week we learned that Jeromy had PASSED both tests and was on his way to the 4th grade. Unfortunately, we knew a few family members and friends who were not so lucky. The sad part about these tests is that they don’t fully assess the WHOLE student. EXAMPLE: A student can do ABOSOLUTELY nothing all year and perform really well on the test, on the flip side: a student can work really hard all year and not test well, so they fail!!!

This is just another instance were we the parents have to be the advocates for our own little students…

-Shanta