Naptime Blog

The news headlines recently covered that two main networks refused to air a Lane Bryant commercial during prime time.  The commercial depicted a “fuller” figured woman in receiving a text from her boyfriend while in sexy undergarments.  The woman throws on her raincoat (with nothing other than the undergarments) and heads out the door.  As a mom of four young children, I am always trying to distract my kids if a “risqué”- themed commercial comes on the screen; however, there is so much of it that it becomes nearly impossible.  As a matter of fact, living in NYC, sometimes walking or driving through Times Square with the billboard ads can be a bit challenging with young children.  I recently remember seeing a photo of a jeans ad on the cover of our local paper with a threesome.  I believe the ad was rejected by Times Square BUT the paper chose to feature it on its cover… for my eight year old to see!  I guess, after a while, a parent just learns how to address it with their children, because these are the times we live in.

I saw an online article comparing the Lane Bryant ad with a Victoria’s Secret ad, the latter being aired on the same networks during prime time that the former was rejected on.  The Victoria Secret ad was just as risqué, and also depicted similar sentiments as the woman who leaves to have sex with nothing but her bra and panties.  So why did the networks ban one and not the other?  The buzz is that the Lane Bryant ad was rejected because Lane Bryant was advertising a full figured woman.  And this is what truly upsets me.

First of all, the model is beautiful.  She is bustier than most of today’s models, but her dress size cannot be more than an 8 or a 10.  But major networks and the whole pop-culture society has created this female body image “perfection” standard to be more of a size 0-2.  Yes, obesity is an issue.  It is a very serious issue.  But society has created these “perfection” goals for young girls which is pushing more and more teens (and younger!) into eating disorders and habits which is just as unhealthy as an obese teen’s eating disorders and habits. 

I am not a skinny woman.  I have always fought with my weight, and having four kids pushed me over the top.  A twin pregnancy followed by another baby only fourteen months later proved to be detrimental to my body size, and I am struggling to get back into a healthier and sexier pair of jeans.  I come from a family of women who have also struggled with their weight.  I try my best to be on top of my eight year old daughter, so that she does not grow up with the same struggles.  I do not want her to be overweight.  I want her to be healthy.  I also want her to be happy and confident in her body.  But when society makes the perfect body image so ridiculously unreal and unfair, this becomes more and more difficult.  Lane Bryant’s blog stated:

It appears that ABC and Fox have made the decision to define beauty for you by denying our new, groundbreaking Cacique commercial from airing freely on their networks.

Unfortunately, their definition of beauty may not be the definition of beauty that I want to teach my children.  While health is one of my main concerns, happiness, self-confidence, contentment, inner strength, respect for self and others, determination, and so many other positive qualities is what I wish to instill in my children (both my daughter AND my three sons) as what a BEAUTIFUL person truly is, not the fact that she wears a size 2 pair of jeans.

Jennifer
Wife to Paul, Mom to Juliana (8), Anthony and Louis (1) and Joseph (7 months)
www.nevaland.com

How quickly the 2010 Winter Olympics have come…  I personally am a Summer Olympics fan myself, but I do like some of the winter sports as well.  I remember the skating greats of the seventies and wonder why my eight year old daughter is not as interested as I was.  I used to imagine myself on the ice, skating beautifully, even would practice in my skates.  I never was that good.
If you were skating in the 2010 Winter Olympics, what song would you dance to?  Would it be a song you liked, a song that means something to you, your theme song?

One of my favorite movies is “Ice Castles” (movie from the 70s with Robbie Benson).  The theme song is “Through the Eyes of Love” by Melissa Manchester (am I showing my age?).  I always said that was the theme song to my life (or at least what I had hoped my life would be when I was a little girl!).  The movie is actually about an ice skater.  Lexie loses her eyesight while skating and then returns to skating later on. Here is a clip from the movie… makes me cry EVERY time I see it. Lexi skates for the first time at a competition and does not want her fans to know she is still without her eyesight…
Now that I am all grown up, married with children, I know that the song means so much more to me…  My husband is my Robbie Benson… He would come and save me after I fall because of the flowers…  And he would stick with me…
 
“Please don’t let this feeling end, it’s everything I am, everything I want to be.  I can see what’s mine now, finding out what’s true.  Since I found you, looking through the eyes of love”.
 
Makes me appreciate everything I have… and how I am exactly where I want to be.

What would YOU dance to?

Jennifer
Wife to Paul, Mom to Juliana (7), Anthony and Louis (1) and Joseph (4 months)
www.nevaland.com

I never thought in my lifetime that I would witness or even be apart of a financial depression. I know the media says the economy is turning around, but it doesn’t feel like it from my stand point. My husband and I both FT jobs outside of the home, but it often feels like we are living check to check

I have always been a bargain shopper, we buy store brands, clip coupons and use store shopping programs (MVP, Rewards, etc.) With all of that being said, it stills feel like I am right in the middle of my own great depression. The things we use to enjoy doing, we have had to cut back on. We use to travel a lot more on the weekends and would try a different restaurant as mush as possible. I do not mind cutting back, but I feel like I can’t even live. Work to pay bills, pay the bills so we can work!

It’s a vicious cycle! Ugggg

Take a look at this interesting article from NPR.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=113054843

How have you and your family survived these tough economic times??

~Shanta

I always saw a little of myself in Kate.  I am not always Mrs. Sunshine, and am the first to admit it.  I could never understand why Jon allowed himself to be spoken to in the manner that she did, and would never want my husband to allow himself to be treated that way by me, nor anyone else for that matter.  And he doesn’t.

Collectively, we have four children with a fifth on the way.  The oldest is my husband’s 18 year old son, and even though he doesn’t live with us, having a teenager in our family is stressful enough.  Add to that a seven year old “Princess” who thinks she is 17 years old (giving us TWO teenagers), twin babies approaching a year old who are trying to walk and talk and have begun to get into everything, and another baby on the way (who happens to at the moment be the most well behaved of our five children, but gives me heartburn and nausea and makes me very tired), and we have a circus!

I love my husband and my children with all my heart and soul.  I am tremendously blessed and would not want my life any other way.  But catch me after my daughter drops my perfume bottle all over the floor at the same time my one son sits on my other son (who has a stinky diaper that leaked through all over the toys) and is hysterically crying, while the dog is in the garbage can for the 6th time today just as my husband calls and says he is going to be home late from work, and I become a scary individual who snaps and yells and starts growing snakes out of my head! 

Now if Medusa continues to take over my body by the time my husband gets home and I continue to snap at him, he will undoubtedly bring me back to reality and remind me that he does not appreciate being spoken to like that.  And he is right.  Then he usually comes over, rubs my neck and gives me a peck on the cheek saying that he knows it isn’t always easy and I am doing a great job.  And I apologize and tell him he’s the best and then I am fine.  But I can’t promise it won’t happen again, and give me a few days and Medusa might return again.  Needless to say I can understand how Kate can lose it with eight kids and how unfortunately (like my husband unfortunately takes the brunt of mine) Jon is at the other end of the tantrum. 

I won’t give her right, just like I won’t give me any right to snap at my husband. I am just saying I can understand.  My husband handles it very well, brings me to reality and doesn’t allow himself to be treated poorly.  On TV, it seems that all these seasons Jon took it, never defending himself, never telling Kate how he does not appreciate her attitude with him, and never asking her to get help.  Add the media and the paparazzi, Kate becomes the monster, Jon becomes the innocent victim, and all of a sudden Jon gets up the nerve to do something about the situation.  Jon doesn’t ask Kate to get help, he doesn’t defend himself, he doesn’t seek out any help himself.  What he does do is he finds a younger girl and has an affair.  And not a discreet affair, but one that is publicized all over the country.  The real victims here are those eight beautiful kids.  And Kate is still the monster.

I cannot believe how many people I have heard who are defending Jon, saying that he dealt with Kate all these years so no wonder why he sought out a girlfriend.  So much for the sanctity of marriage.  So much for protecting the children.  Yes, fame and money has gotten to their heads, but bottom line is they are still a family.  And neither one of them is right. 

Kate recently said that the divorce rate for parents with multiples is higher than the general population.  True, but that doesn’t mean every family with multiples becomes a casualty of that fact.  My husband and I work on our relationship daily, and we will continue to do so for each other and our children.  As each of us has been divorced previously, we know it is not easy.  But we respect each other and hope that we remain as happy in our marriage as we have always been.

Jennifer
Mom to Juliana (7), Louis (9m) and Anthony (9m)
Expecting #4 in September!
www.nevaland.com