Naptime Blog

Christmas?? Where’s the cold weather? Where’s the snow? Christmas in South Florida is certainly not what I want. Right now we have a “cold front” which is what, like 60 degrees?? Its beautiful during the day, don’t get me wrong and I enjoy it but when its 90 degrees on Christmas day, it kinda stinks. Growing up in NY, snow was almost a guarantee for Christmas Eve and the day of. Every house and apartment balcony, it seems were covered in festive lights. While people do decorate here, its not the same. I don’t know how to describe it either, but its just different. Our Christmas in Missouri had snow. We made snow angels and were so happy with a hot cup of cocoa (or coffee ). Here… well, I can have a “hot chocolate” ICED. I’m not a “hot drinker’ on hot days.

Regardless, I have decorated our apartment very Christmasy and I love it. Stockings are up on the wall, not a fire place. Artificial tree is up, because I’m allergic to the real stuff, and I will be buying canned “frost” for our windows haha! Though Christmas here is not like how I remember it or want it to be, it still is Christmas. Its not about weather or presents, but also about being selfless and giving, and to truly appreciate life and all who are in it. But the gifts don’t hurt either!

-Krystle

I searched high & low for the best convertible car seat for Jayce. He is 10 months and close to 25 lbs. His little legs have been hanging over that infant carrier for a few months now

There are many brands on the market today for convertible car seats. Many names that have been around for years; and a few new kids on the block as well.

I really wanted to get a lot of bang for my $buck$! I polled other moms, researched online reviews and window wished for awhile before I found the perfect one for us.

I was eyeballing the Alpha-Omega Elite for awhile. But, I was not ready to dish out $200 for it. Well, once I got a really good review from another mom whose son was not much older than Jayce, I was sold!!

The 15% off coupon from Babies R Us didn’t hurt either.

Here is my BIG boy in his new car seat!

~Shanta

Continuing with the theme of last week’s post, I chose the topic of conservation and preservation. Those two words have several meanings and I am sure you are thinking of several right now. Let’s think first about environmental connotations. When you conserve a resource, you preserve it for future generations. You can choose not to use something or use it with restraint, thereby conserving it and preserving it for additional or future use.

Now, how about socially? When you conserve or use restraint when voicing your opinion you sometimes achieve more than when you use it or express it. I have seen plenty of situations where I thought in no uncertain terms, “she really should have kept her mouth shut” when I read a post or some comment. Not only does it reflect directly on you but it biases people to you and your whole personality. I am not saying that if something deserves a negative comment that you should not say it. I am saying that words should have substance and meaning and not be hollow.

Many people thrive in conflict. Those people probably have poor self esteem or an ego that hardly fits in their own skin. Those are the people that everyone likes to watch to see what happens. But do you really trust that person? Do you value their opinion or are you watching with morbid curiosity to see just how low they will sink and how much they will corrupt their own values to make a point?

Would that person better have served themselves and their social community by conserving their words and preserving their dignity?

I know these are all common sense thoughts and seem like fluff but how many times have you heard the saying “Common sense isn’t so common”. Really think about what you are saying when you say it, you not only will conserve some oxygen but you may preserve your own character.  I really do have to force myself to live by my own words sometimes but I always recall a little plaque my grandparent’s had in their house. It looked like a safety warning label and it said “Be sure brain is engaged, before putting mouth into gear!”

Shannon
Potamus Prefers
http://www.potamusprefers.com/

Time management is an art form.  Whether you are a working mom, work at home mom or stay at home mom, there always seems to be a million and one things to get done.  As a mother of four young children, I always find myself running out of time by the end of the day.  I wish there were more hours in a day, maybe then I could manage to get all the laundry put away or have time to do all my writing in a timely manner. 

When I am asked how I manage my home, being wife and mom of four, family therapist and freelance writer, then adding in cooking, cleaning and other chores, plus my full time job as City Ambassador of New York City’s MomsLikeMe.com, I laugh.  I try to manage my time as effectively as possible.  That often means that I am on conference calls while nursing the baby or counseling a client by phone while cutting vegetables for dinner! 

Here are some tips for helping with the daily crunch, although I must admit I need to brush up on my own time management skills!
Prioritize

I try to make a mental note each morning of what absolutely needs to get done today and what can wait if necessary.  For instance, my daughter has gym class on Wednesdays and needs her gym outfit.  So I need to be sure on Tuesday morning, if I haven’t already, her laundry needs to be done so her gym clothes are ready for that evening.  May sound simple, but I cannot remember how many times I have been left doing laundry Tuesday night because I procrastinated doing the laundry all day and needed to get it done.

Luckily for me I have deadlines with work.  As I work from home, there is always work that needs to be done: Newsletters are due by Wednesday morning, content reports are due by Sunday afternoon, articles are due by month’s end, etc.  I live by the alarms on my blackberry and Outlook, so when “Newsletter Due – 4 hours” pops up on screen, I know I better make sure I am almost done with the week’s newsletter!

I enjoy my twice a month manicures and pedicures.  Those times are my “me” times, where I get peace and quiet (and even a little massage!), time to myself, and I walk out feeling that much better about myself when my nails look good.  Yes, it does take two hours out of my time, but for me, I am recharged and refueled for a little while.  So I am sure to add my nail salon time into my list of priorities.  I do recommend every mom does the same:  whether it is time to read that book, time for a bubble bath, time to go jogging, or whatever it is that helps keep you going, “me” time should be a priority.

Delegate

If you are anything like me, you have a hard time delegating chores out to other family members.  I need to get passed the “If you want something right, you have to do it yourself” mentality, because if I don’t, I will never get everything I need done.  Naturally, when you have children and a home to keep clean, laundry to do, whether you are a working mom or stay at home mom, it can become challenging to do it all by yourself week after week.

Obviously if you have very young children, you cannot ask them to help with your tasks.  However, even a young toddler can help clean up.  I like to go over to my fifteen month old twins and have them each pick up a toy to put back into the toy chest each evening before bedtime.  I find that now, I will see them occasionally putting a toy back in the toy chest without being asked to.  If we continue to do this regularly, it will become habit with the boys, and they will be on their way to keeping their own toys and putting things away themselves, which is one thing less that I will need to do after putting them to bed every night.

My daughter is seven years old.  I have asked her to sit with the baby and feed him his bottle while I am a few feet away writing an article or folding laundry.  I have also asked her to help out by putting the clothes from the washing machine into the dryer for me.  I still need to check everything she does and I still need to keep an eye on her, but the extra pair of hands really helps out every now and then.  Now if I can only get her to keep her room clean!

My husband washes the dishes every night.  I am very lucky to have had him volunteer to do this from when we first got married.  The plan was that if I cook, he will do the dishes.  And he has held up his end of the deal.  This allows me to finish up with what I have to get done while he is doing the dishes.  Maybe your spouse is not into doing dishes.  Ask him if he can help with bathing the children or some other duty that you would usually do.   

Organization

In some aspects I am extremely organized but in others I am a mess.  If I can only get my closets and drawers as organized as they should be, I would find a lot more time during the day that I waste on searching for the match to a shoe or a missing receipt in a pile of mail!  I am the first to admit this is one of my biggest downfalls in time management skills.  For as long as I can remember, I find myself spending way too much time searching for missing things.  My biggest problem with this issue is when I put something away for safe keeping and then cannot remember where I put it, therefore spending way too much time sorting through drawers and closets to find it!  Regardless of my own demons, it is always a good idea to be organized.  As you can see from my experiences, it can help save a ton of time!

While I may not be the best in organizing closets, cabinets, drawers and storage space, I am organized with most everything else.  My blackberry is priceless.  I have my daughter’s school schedule in my calendar, along with every doctor’s appointment, work event, party and other items which I have set with reminders to help me remember them.  I have my emails go through my blackberry as well, so when I get an important email, I save it it my blackberry so I can refer to it if away from my computer.  I have my entire address book in my blackberry as well, and try to add any contacts I meet daily in there, should I lose a business card or slip of paper with a name and address on it.  I include either the person’s company info or reason for contact in the entry, so I can search easily.  I even have Microsoft Word, Excel and Powerpoint downloaded onto my blackberry so that I can open important files and get other information when I am on the go.   In addition to my blackberry, one can also often find notes all around my house:  sticky notes on my mirror, checklists on my desk or dining room table, and notes from my daughter’s school tacked on to the refrigerator.  I have even been known to tack a note onto the inside of my front door so that I won’t forget something when I leave.  Hey, whatever works, right?

There are only twenty-four hours in a day.  At least six or eight of those hours should be spent sleeping, to recharge for the next day.  Naturally, as parents, we are going to run out of the remaining sixteen hours.  They go by so quickly!

Jennifer
Wife to Paul, Mom to Juliana (7), Anthony and Louis (1) and Joseph (Newborn)
www.nevaland.com

My grandmother is in town from NY for Thanksgiving and everything has been wonderful. I offered to make a couple of dishes to help relieve some cooking stress her and my mom would have had if they had to make all that food. I made green bean casserole and sweet potato casserole. We called over to see if they had at least made some mashed potatoes, which they hadn’t. So my husband quickly whipped up homemade mashed potatoes which was delicious. He also made a really good dessert the nite before called “Chocolate Delight” and boy was it.

With the high chair up to the table at my moms, we said a prayer and dug in! Having a big spoonful of each dish we had, Shaughn also had on his plate some turkey, rice, potatoes, sweet potatoes, and green beans. He was in food heaven! After we all stuffed our faces, it was time for naps! Well…. a nap for Shaughn and me! He very rarely naps past 4pm, but tonight he and I crashed out from 7pm til 9. Well, 9 is normally his bed time but that night we had to go visit our friends’ home who are pretty much our extended family. I’ve known my friend Peter for about 15 years through school so all of his family and siblings have become mine as well, and they are such wonderful people.

Before we left to go there, Shaughn was being silly and playful and all of a sudden just got up and stood up for the first time by himself! Now when you tell him to stand up, he does it for a couple of seconds before laughing and plopping down. We had helped stand him up in the past and he stayed like that. Then the other day he used a pillow instead of furniture to stand up, but on this day he didn’t need ANY help which was another “first”! Every new thing Shaughn learns is amazing and I can’t wait to see what’s next!

-Krystle

My poor little baby! This morning Tristan fell forward onto a plastic crate and his bottom teeth went RIGHT THROUGH below his lower lip! ALL THE WAY THROUGH! I scooped him up and I all but literally ran to the ER. I completely expected stitches for my little man….BUT…the Dr. said that it will close on it’s own. SIGH OF RELIEF! We simply cleaned it well and we were to daycare in 35 minutes from the time of the accident! I love our new fast track ER. You are in and out.  The accident happened when we were leaving for daycare. When we got there Tristan walked straight up to Cora (his daycare provider) and said “CORA….WOOK (look)!”. He just HAD to show off his booboo! It was soo sweet! This is going to be one long bumpy ride with this crazy boy!

At daycare Tristan has an electric tractor, his new thing is to stand on it and operate it. Talk about a heart attack.

Chrystal

The boy is standing on his own! But don’t come near him and try to
help him walk because he plops down on his bottom and thinks you’re
playing a game! Shaughn mastered walking around the coffee table while
holding it. Sometimes he takes a leap towards the one of our couches
and holds on to that as he walks around. But a few days ago, he was in
the center of the living room and got himself standing using a pillow
as support and just stood there for a quick moment. As my husband and
I cheered him on, he started giggling and tossed himself onto the
pillow. We also started laughing at that, so of course, he does it
again…and again… and again. I grabbed his hands this morning and
tried to encourage him to take some steps. He took about 3 steps
before he decided he wasn’t going to do it anymore and laughed as he
fell on his butt. Again, this is one of those times where my stubborn
little boy will decide when and where he does something. I couldn’t
help him crawl, he wanted no part of it until one day he decided it
was time to take off, as if he knew all along what he was doing.

I also don’t want to rush anything! Every time he does something new I
am just so amazed by how much time has literally flown by us these
last 14 months. The last couple of nights, he’s actually been “sleep
talking.” Its very odd, and there haven’t been any changes to his
daily routine that would cause him to be stressed. He just babbles for
about a minute or two, as he does when he’s awake, and when I go in
there thinking he’s awake, he’s actually fast asleep holding onto his
little bear. According to sites, its rather normal, which is
comforting. I talked in my sleep all the time, and used to sleep walk
til I was about 14. I’m a huge talker now so maybe that’s where
Shaughn gets it from. Is that kind of inherited? Anyone have children
who sleep walk/talk? Or worst, have nightmares/terrors? Reading about
it freaks me out, what’s a parent to do?

-Krystle

When I was in college, I worked in a dental office with an older woman who had children.  Her children were not more than five or so years older than I was.  I clearly remember the time she was sharing the birth story of her oldest son.  She explained how she begged the OB to allow the nurse to bring an ash tray into the delivery room.  The doctor obliged, and in between contractions, Vicky smoked her Camels.  I asked my Mom about the validity of this, and my Mom said that although there was no smoking in the delivery room or operating room when I was born, the moms were allowed to smoke in their rooms through labor and after the baby was born.  I was amazed and shocked.

My Mom went on to tell me how mothers smoking cigarettes during pregnancy was the norm back in the sixties and seventies.  She also said that no one had ever mentioned not eating certain cheeses and fish during pregnancy, how mothers would drink wine while pregnant and that times have certainly changed from the time I was born to the time my children were born.

I recently took part in a discussion with other mothers of today about their lifestyles and lifestyle changes, if any, during their pregnancies.  I think it is safe to say that most moms today are ‘middle of the road’ as opposed to either living like they are in a bubble or living on the wild side. 

I have been pregnant five times.  I miscarried my first two pregnancies, then went on to have four healthy babies.  If you are doing the math, yes, one of the pregnancies was a set of twins!  While I was high risk and followed doctor’s orders when it came to such things as taking my progesterone suppositories and going on modified bedrest at 28 weeks, I did not necessarily live every moment of my life by the words of ‘A Perfect Pregnancy’… you know, the compilation of hundreds of books written by a million doctors, midwives, philosophers and anyone claiming to have knowledge of childbirth, that is sold in every bookstore!  I am referring to all those books that make moms-to-be afraid to breathe.  I actually find it amazing how each of these “professionals” has a different set of facts and statistics, many contradicting each other, and many not taking into consideration how every pregnancy, like every baby, is different.

I would never claim to be a medical professional, I am a family counselor.  But after having four children and working with many mothers and moms-to-be, I have developed my own philosophy.  What does not harm a woman when she is not pregnant won’t harm her when she is pregnant, as long as, like everything else, it is done in moderation.  Illegal drugs are never good for anyone, pregnant or not, so that is not even a question for a pregnant woman.  But a glass of wine here and there has never proven to be harmful, and I have had a few sips of wine and beer over the course of all of my pregnancies.

After losing two babies, I was brought to the stage of blaming myself.  I questioned if my smoking cigarettes before I knew I was pregnant both times made me lose the babies.  And as I had tried to quit smoking for many years, I also smoked before I knew I was pregnant with two of my healthy pregnancies as well, quitting the moment I got positive pregnancy test both times.  I asked my doctor, who of course tried to get me to quit for years, and even he admitted that my losses had nothing to do with me smoking.  Even though I smoked less than a pack a day, I always knew it was not healthy for ANYONE, and am proud to say that I have been smoke-free for almost three years now!  But, the two cigarettes I had each day during those pregnancies did not cause the losses. 

My losses weren’t caused by the bologna and cheese sandwich I ate, nor the time I colored my hair before my cousin’s wedding, nor the two Tylenol I took for that headache I had when I was newly pregnant.  As a matter of fact, there are so many things that we are told to stay away from during pregnancy, and so many things we need to be aware of when we are expecting (like don’t eat that soft cheese!), those things alone can make us go nuts!  Here is a list of things that we have all heard (or maybe not!) about what to stay away from while being pregnant.  Please note that I am not saying ANY of these things are either harmful or not, I would suggest that if you are concerned with any of these items on the list, you should research the validity of it and ask your doctor or midwife before you change your entire lifestyle.  Some of these things are more dangerous than others, so be careful and mindful of your precious cargo!

• Smoking
• Drinking wine and other alcohol
• Coloring hair
• Drinking coffee and other caffeinated products
• Taking drugs (legal or illegal, prescribed or over the counter)
• Heavy lifting
• Painting rooms (and breathing in fumes from paint)
• Eating sushi and other raw fish
• Eating soft cheeses
• Eating deli meats
• Taking something for pain, even “safe” medicines
• Riding roller coasters
• Not watching salt/sugar intake
• Changing the cat’s litter
• Acrylic nails
• Climbing ladders
• Playing sports
• Working stressful jobs
• Using artificial sweeteners
• Going tanning
• Eating Tuna
• Eating undercooked meat

REMEMBER: This is just a list of what different people have noted to be unsafe.  Not all are proven unsafe, especially in moderation!  Do your research and ask your doctor!

After losing two babies and giving birth to four healthy babies, I am a firm believer that for the most part, a healthy baby will survive pregnancy, and a baby with serious enough defects from conception (or if the mom has serious enough reproductive problems of her own, as in my case) will not.  Getting acrylic tips on your nails won’t cause a miscarriage. 

As far as the health of your child, I would again do your research and ask your pediatrician.  You may want to adjust your habits or better monitor your child’s habits.  I look back now at the ‘seasonal asthma’ that my daughter was diagnosed with as a toddler and note that it is pretty much non-existent now that she is almost eight.  Did she grow out of it?  Or is it because I quit smoking almost 3 years ago?  Although I always left the room when I lit up a cigarette, smoke has its way of traveling.  We are all better off now. 

I am very fortunate to have a wonderful OB/GYN.  He always reminded me during my pregnancies that it was best to weigh the pros and cons before making any decisions in pregnancy.  For instance, when I went to him crying with excruciating heartburn that would not get better no matter how many Tums, Zantac and a ton more “safe” medications I took, he prescribed Nexium.  As it was in the end of my second trimester and the baby’s organs were all fully developed by that point, we needed to weigh the fact that I could not sleep at night nor was I eating right because I was in too much pain.  This outweighed the so called cons of taking this drug.  So I took a Class C drug at the end of my last two pregnancies and all was well.  Class C drugs later in pregnancy are generally not harful.

As for craving a cup of coffee or a slice of ham?  Again, in moderation, caffeine will do no harm to anyone and as long as that slice of ham comes from a reputable deli with no known reason to believe that anyone would get poisoning from eating there, feed the craving.  Enjoy your pregnancy.   Before you know it your baby will be grown up and you will have missed out on this most wonderful time of your life because you were too worried about every breath you took.

Jennifer
Wife to Paul, Mom to Juliana (7), Anthony and Louis (1) and Joseph (Newborn)
www.nevaland.com

There is such a huge age difference between my children. I really don’t remember all of those home remedies and rules that you follow when it comes to raising a baby. I guess it is really like starting all over again!! Jeromy, our oldest is 9 and Jayce is 10 months.

While I feel very lucky to have stumbled across the great value and savings with Parent’s Choice Infant Formula, I’m still ready to explore the possibility of whole milk. With things being really tight financially it would be a lot better for the family if I could just buy 1 milk product for everyone. Jeromy is a lover of ALL things cereal, so it never goes to waste.

The problem is I don’t remember how/what/when & where you start introducing the whole milk. It would be easy to just call his pediatrician and ask, but I have been that ‘bug-a-boo parent’ with this baby. I don’t think I called the doctor nearly as much with Jeromy. From the time baby Jayce came home, I have had his pediatrician on speed dial. It just took sooooo long for him to get here I guess,,,

I love the savings and nutritional value I get from his current formula, but I am preparing for the next step. Maybe I will research the next stage formulas, never tried any of those type of products before.

What did you moms do after the infant formula stage?

~Shanta