Naptime Blog

We recently spent a great weekend in Colonial Williamsburg for a short family vacation.  My daughter loves to swim, and this was the first time my sons were in a pool.  They loved it (as I expected)!  In Wal-Mart, we bought two baby tubes for $3 each (the best six bucks we ever spent), and the boys loved to sit in them and lounge around like the little princes that they are!

I was resting my feet on a lounge chair by the pool while my husband and the kids were swimming.  My feet were swelled from having walked the amusement park the day before and the humidity and heat didn’t help.  But it was so relaxing to sit and watch Paul and the kids have a blast.

A woman came over to me and asked if the twins were mine.  She was tall and thin, very attractive, and was very friendly.  I answered her that they were mine, and that they were ten months old.  She pointed to the kiddie pool and showed me her 5 year old twin daughters and 3 ½ year old triplet sons.  I was amazed and thought to myself how well put together she seemed and how well behaved the five little ones were.  We engaged in a nice conversation about raising multiples and how our families were managing.  I told her I was expecting again in September, and how I would have three babies under fifteen months old.  This woman had five babies in eighteen months.  She said she had two older children as well.  She was recently remarried, as the father of the seven children left her, claiming he couldn’t take it.  Her new husband also had older children of his own, and she commented how he was very good to her children.  She previously spent three years as a single mother of seven before remarrying.

We got to talking about how I felt so overwhelmed when I found out I was pregnant with this new baby when the twins were only six months old.  I remember crying for three weeks, feeling as if I would never get out again for the next few years, wondering how in the world I would manage with all these kids so close in age, and feeling guilty that I could not possibly give the attention to the three children I already had at home while having a newborn.  And the thought of three babies in diapers at once, three more babies to potty train, having to do the nighttime feedings again, and just the whole idea of adding another child into the mix just was a lot to swallow.  And here I was looking at this mom of seven who managed for three years alone and from the looks of the kids and how everyone was interacting; it seemed she was doing a great job.

I remarked about still feeling overwhelmed about having another baby so soon.  The woman asked me if I felt overwhelmed when I found out I was having the twins.  Come to think of it, it isn’t so much that I felt overwhelmed, but I would question being able to handle my older daughter and two newborns at once.  I had no idea how I would manage nighttime feedings with two… heck, I had no idea how I was going to manage daytime feedings with two!  And all of those little thoughts made me anxious for much of my pregnancy with the twins.  Here we are, almost a year later, and the boys were sleeping through the night by seven weeks, they are happy, healthy children learning to walk and talk, and it has not been bad at all!  Not to say it isn’t sometimes challenging, but we take it day by day and we are doing quite well!

So then she reminded me that it will be the same way with the new baby.  She told me that when she stopped saying to herself “How am I going to do this?” and changed her thought process to “I can do this”, things got much easier.

We are going to have four children at home with us.  Although my older daughter is growing up, she still needs help with homework, occasional assistance with picking out her clothes (she has the tendency to walk out of her room with wacky combinations of clothing for instance) and needs to be disciplined for that mouth of hers, she is a big help to me with the babies.  And I have my family and my in-laws who are a great support as well.  Paul is a gem as a support, and he helped with the twins as infants, as he still helps today.  He is a great help with Juliana as well, although sometimes he doesn’t understand the little girl “melodrama” we often have to deal with, as his son obviously never gave him that growing up.

Today, my biggest worry is getting out of the house when I am alone with the kids.  I don’t think I will get a triple stroller at this point, for now I will use a carrier for the new baby and use the double stroller for the twins.  That might change in the future.  If I go out with the car, I will just have to take it slow and plan in advance.  I will welcome any help during the day I can get, but for the majority of the time it will be me alone with the little ones.  And you know what?  I CAN DO IT.  I WILL DO IT!  Stay tuned for more!

Jennifer
Mom to Juliana (7), Louis (9m) and Anthony (9m)
Expecting #4 in September!
www.nevaland.com