Naptime Blog

Don’t get me wrong.  I love my life.  I have the most amazing husband and my kids are a pure joy.  I am truly blessed.  But I am in a funk and have been in one all week long.  I am not sure if it is because it is the dead of winter and it is too cold to go outside for very long, or if it is because I am overwhelmed with keeping up with the chores and the kids and all the “extras” that I have to deal with daily…  or maybe it is just because I am in an inexplainable funk!

I have done, no exaggeration, about 18 loads of laundry so far this week, and at this very moment, I have two full laundry baskets of dirty clothes to wash, dry, fold and put away.   I have to bread chicken cutlets and get my kids to sort their 4 puzzles that are all over the living room floor.  The baby is starting to get into everything, so he joins the ranks of his older siblings to add to my worries.  And to top it off, my husband is leaving on Tuesday for a 6 day business trip on the other side of the country, so I will be on my own for a bit. 

I know I will get out of this funk, I just have to take better care of myself.  Too much coffee and not enough healthy meals.  And of course increasing my exercise is a given as well.  We always take care of everyone else, and it is time to put Mommy first. 

Is anyone else in a funk this week:?

…just happens to be the three things I never really liked!  Can you believe I spend more time with my mop, broom and vaccuum than I do with my husband?  Don’t believe me?  Well, if I detailed my weekly schedule with you, you will see that I do about 18 loads of laundry a week and sweep my kitchen, dining room and living room at least 4 times a day (each room!)

I remember when I was a little girl, when my mom would use the expression “Well, the fairies aren’t going to come in the middle of the night and clean it!” with regards to how we needed to pick up after ourselves.  I have tried this with my kids, and so far, it has not worked.  I do not know how they always manage to bring a snack into the living room or find any little paper to tear up on the rug.  And no matter what they eat for breakfast, lunch or dinner, under my dining room table is screaming “SWEEP ME!”  I have been doing a ton of laundry every week since we had the last three babies.  Now that it is winter time (more layers of clothing) and the boys are potty training at night (changing sheets every morning), I am doing more laundry than ever before.

The price of  laundry detergent and dryer sheets is ridiculous.  The store brand dryer sheets smell AWESOME and are a third of the price.  Thank goodness for that!  I also recently replaced my Swiffer Wetjet with a store brand device — do you believe this thing uses your own floor cleaner, the pads are washable (yes, this increases my laundry load BUT saves me a ton on disposable pads!) AND you don’t need batteries (it is a spray!)  I LOVE this thing!  Totally beats a mop and can run circles around the Wetjet.

With four kids, I just wish I could spend one day home and not have to clean up after someone all day long.  Until that happens, I guess I might as well call my cleaning supplies my friends.

Three years ago, when our twins were only a few months old, Paul and I started house hunting.  There was one house in Seaford, Long Island, that caught both of our eyes.  This house was perfect for our family of five.  It was empty, and it would require updating three bathrooms and the kitchen, but we still loved the house.   At the time, the prices of houses were still astronomical, and shortly thereafter, I found out I was pregnant again.  The house hunting stopped, as I was not ready to move away from my family, needing the help of my mother and family with four little kids, three of them babies.

We planned on resuming our hunt next year (the beginning of 2013).  In the meantime, I still get daily multiple listing reports, and we found out that the Seaford house was still for sale, at a DRAMATIC decrease in price.  Going into the New Year last weekend, we were certain that this was kismet.  After all, this house has been coming up for three years.  We had seen the decrease a year ago, and now another decrease.  This house was now SUPER affordable and still available.  We made an appointment with the listing agent for the 2nd of January and neither of us could sleep the night before.  We could TASTE being Seaford homeowners!

The house was everything we remembered, and it still was what we were looking for.  But renovating three bathrooms and a kitchen would add tens of thousands of dollars to the price of the home.  When the agent first said to us that she’d send us listings that were similar and in the same price range, I told her that if this house didn’t work out for us, we’d hold off on the hunt til our original plan of next year.   But when we got the listings later that afternoon and saw that the similar houses at the similar price (minus all the work!), we were completely intrigued. 

Almost a week later, we have five appointments set up tomorrow to look at houses.  Paul began the process of pre-approving us for a mortgage, and I should be thrilled.  After the health and happiness of our family, all I want is our own home.  So what am I afraid of?

My husband and I stayed up really late on Christmas night to make sure we sorted all the old toys and arranged all the new toys so that our living room actually looked like a living room instead of a disaster.  We were so proud of ourselves that not only could we actually see our floors, we had even LESS of a mess than BEFORE all the new toys!  Here we are, not even two weeks later, and my nerves were shot with all of the missing pieces from the new toys!  Yes, there are certain things that completely irk me and actually make me anxious…  when my kids mix the colors of the PlayDoh and when puzzles, games and other toys are missing a piece or two (or 10!)  I recognize that I have a problem, but of course there could be much worse problems to have, right?

I spent the majority of the day today doing laundry and tearing apart my living room (AGAIN!), sorting the toys, finding the missing pieces, sweeping (and sweeping and sweeping and sweeping… these kids always seem to find a snack and then find there way into the living room when I am on the floor or in a corner and can’t see them!) and rearranging.  I am happy to report that all of the puzzles (except one… but I am on a mission to find that one piece) have all of their pieces and all of the games (except one… GRRR) are in their respective boxes with all the pieces intact. 

I can be pretty certain that by the end of the week things will be a mess again.  I try and try to keep things in order, I put things with small pieces in the closet, I have cases and containers for all blocks and such, but no matter what I do and how I teach my kids to clean up after themselves, they always manage to make a mess.  My kids are wiseguys, too!  I keep saying “Only one toy at a time.  When you are done with a toy, put that away and you can take out a new toy”  And of course I am always met with some comment like “But Mom!  I am playing with these blocks and JoeJoe is playing with those cars!” or something like that.  I have tried again and again to get them all to play with one toy at a time (all three boys) but so far, no luck.  So with three toddlers each playing their own toy, we are bound to mix up some pieces! 

Ugh.  I guess I just have to deal with this until they are teenagers!  LOL!

If you have been following along with me in my blogging history on Naptime Stories, you may remember that I am a Therapist.  I have been working from home as a webmaster for a mothers’ social network, and I believe that it certainly fits well with my career path – as new moms and veteran moms always need an outlet to chat, share, vent and remember they are not alone in their mothering woes!  Over the past few months, I have returned to more of a formal therapist role as a Behavioral Coach for AbilTo.  And in working with clients daily, I have been reflecting on my own life and the year 2011.

First of all, I cannot believe how fast the year has flown.  I do not know if that is because I am constantly busy with my kids and dealing with three toddlers and a tween girl, or just because I am getting older.  But the one thing I have learned in working with my clients is to remember how truly blessed I really am. 

My year started out with tears and grief, as my Grandfather passed away on January 3.  I miss him dearly.  In March, I was laid off from my full-time “at-home” job of running the NYC MomsLikeMe site.  But then the year started looking up.  I re-vamped my Mommy’s Links site to a social network, we took the kids to DisneyWorld, found my niche in my little corner of the World Wide Web, and returned to counseling with Abilto. 

We’ve made a lot of progress at home as well.  I spend many months at home, because after all, with three infants, unless my husband was home or my mom was around to help me, it was quite difficult to get around.  Over the last few months, the twins started nursery school, and twice a week we all get into the car and get them to and from school.  One of the twins is completely potty trained, which makes my life much easier.  If only the other would follow suit!  And the baby is chock full of sentences and animation.  While life is completely chaotic, these last few months have been a lot of fun (well, when they are behaving!!!)

My husband and I took two weekend trips to the Poconos with friends, and we’re looking forward to our annual spring trip again.  We don’t have as much time alone together these days, but we make the best of every moment. 

So yes, I live a completely chaotic life, and I am sure it is only bound to get worse as these kids get older, but I am truly blessed.  I have a wonderful family, we have our health, and I love my career choices.  Thank you, 2011, for helping me remember these things.  Bring on 2012!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

With four kids and two crazy families, opening gifts on Christmas morning does not stop after the Santa Claus presents get opened.  As a matter of fact, this Christmas, we started at 8am and didn’t finish until 2pm!  After the Santa gifts, the kids opened gifts from Mommy and Daddy and each other.  We do a big breakfast with the family, so as we were finishing up, my two aunts gave the kids their presents, then my parents came in with theirs, followed by my sister and her boyfriend, and my brother and his roommate.  We stopped briefly for breakfast, and the kids returned to the tree to play with their new treasures.   Already, I was unable to find my living room floor.  Just as I was moving boxes and making a path to the back door, my mother-in-law and her husband come in with their bags, followed directly behind her by my father-in-law and his wife!  By one-thirty in the afternoon, I was very frazzled!

On top of it all, I was hosting Christmas dinner!  Luckily, my aunts helped with the artichokes and mushrooms and my mom had prepared the lasagna and meatballs.  My mother-in-law brought the antipasto, so in between TRYING to find my children amongst the toys, cars, boxes, ripped papers and garbage bags, I was preparing veggies and meat and other parts to our meal.  And every few minutes, I would glance into my living room and wonder WHERE IN THE WORLD ARE WE GOING TO HOUSE ALL THESE TOYS?

When all of our guests left, my husband and I decided we needed to do something, for if the kids woke up in the morning to this mess of toys, who knows where things would land and what would get misplaced or broken.  So we emptied their toy boxes and sorted out the old toys.  We opened all of the new toy boxes and he broke up the boxes for recycling.  We did our best to put what we could in the toy boxes, the new books went into the book case, the new DVDs into the entertainment center along with the new video games.  The board games we put in the closet, and all the new clothes went into a laundry basket to be brought up and put away. 

Could you imagine my delight when I could see my living room floor again?

Christmas is now four days ago.  This morning I was straightening up and found a shopping bag under the table with my Christmas Village on it (I had it covered with a long tablecloth and forgot I put the shopping bag under it) with more GIFTS for the kids!  My mom had brought them last week from a family friend and I was holding them until Christmas morning, and then it slipped my mind.  And don’t you know it – MORE TOYS!

We say it every year, and I know we will say it again next year – WE NEED TO STOP GOING OVERBOARD!  But then again, kids are only kids for a short time, and these memories they will have their whole lives.  I remember when my parents’ living room floor couldn’t be seen, and those were some of the best days of my childhood!

I hope you are all enjoying the (chaotic and sometimes messy!) holidays!

In this most wonderful time of the year, you may also be calling it the most chaotic time of the year!  I know for our home, we are truly enjoying the family time, the sharing and caring, but we are also overwhelmed with the craziness that comes along with it!  And also, at this time of year, I am remembering those I loved and lost, and trying to keep their memory alive (which is why we still do all the traditional holiday planning and activities, which is part of the craziness!)

On behalf of Shelton Interactive and Chicken Soup for the Soul, I’d like to share with you a free e-book download of Chicken Soup for the Soul: Devotional Stories for Tough Times. 

Chicken Soup for the Soul books are available in e-book format for your e-reader, smart phone or computer! This free e-book works on all e-readers — Kindle, Nook, iPad, Kobo, iPod Touch, iPhone, and others, and all generations of them. Don’t worry, though. If you don’t have an e-reader (or receive one this holiday season) you can still enjoy this free book on your computer. 

The free download is included below. They are only available for a limited time.

To download from Amazon: http://amzn.to/shsW6O

To download from Barnes & Noble: http://bit.ly/tYS2cB

To download from Apple iTunes: http://bit.ly/tYiaoD

To download from Kobo Books: http://bit.ly/uMSyrX

Enjoy your book!

It is a gift that is over 20 years old, but is still with me. I was ten years old that Christmas and I wanted a special gift that year. My parents didn’t have much, but they did give me a great gift each year. I asked my mom for a doll to play with. I had a few Barbie dolls, but nothing like a big doll that I could take care of. I wanted a doll that I could treat like my baby.

Christmas morning, I found my doll. It was UGLY! I asked my mom why I got this ugly doll. It was a Wrinkles dog puppet. Its face was scrunched up like a sharpie. But, I realized she was soft and cuddly.

I named her Emily and put my baby clothes on her. She went with me everywhere except for school and church. She kept me company after I had a nightmare and watched over me while I did my homework.

Today, Emily is still with me and is the only childhood toy I’ve kept. She still wears my pink baby dress over her original outfit. Emily still carries her toy bone in her dress pocket. She sits on my desk in my room keeping watch. What makes her even more special is that since my mom isn’t with me anymore, Emily can remind me of the best Christmas I ever had as a kid.

Eeeek! If you’re a Santa-believer, your day of reckoning has come. It is a day that many parents dread if they’ve introduced their children to Santa. So how can you handle this? Here are some tips:

1. Ask your child what he or she heard. Kids hear many things at many times and the information can be very inaccurate. It is always good to ask your kids what exactly they heard. Once you know what you’re dealing with, you can move on to the next step.
2. Where did he or she hear it? Ask your child where he or she got the information from.  You can then try to speak to this individual about what you’d like your child to believe about Santa. Or you can let your child figure out what to believe.
3. Consider your child’s age. If your child is pre-school or school age, you can try to salvage this by simply asking your child what he or she believes in. Chances are, your child may not be ready to let go of Santa just yet.
4. Tell the truth. If your child fixates on the fact that Santa isn’t real or is old enough to realize it, be honest about it. There is no point in continuing a tradition that your child does not believe in.

This happened to me. My son (age 10) told me last year that he didn’t think Santa was real. He then said that he thought I was Santa because his gifts were never under the tree until Christmas. (I purposely keep his gifts hidden to keep the Santa tradition alive.) I believe that kids should be allowed to be kids and enjoy the holiday. But, my Santa party is over.

I explained to my son all about the tradition of Santa Claus. He learned the story of St. Nicholas (http://www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/who-is-st-nicholas/) who lived during the 4^th Century and gave his belongings away. Then I shared that St. Nicholas was the model for Santa Claus (http://www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/origin-of-santa/) . Kiddo learned more about the saint at school so I didn’t have to explain much. But, he was happy to hear about where Santa came from and to learn about St. Nicholas. Either way you decide what is best for your child. Happy Holidays!

I LOVE music! It is one of my passions and I especially love holiday music. I love traditional Christmas songs (Silent Night, Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Santa Claus is Coming to Town) in English and some favorites in Spanish. Silent Night (Noche de Paz – Night of Peace), Pastores a Belen (Shepherds to Bethlehem) and Hacia Belen (Towards Bethlehem) are my top three Spanish holiday carols. When I listen and sing along to these three songs, I’m a kid again in our tiny chapel.

Other songs that have found their way to my heart are parody songs. Parody songs are tunes written to make us laugh. I will be the first one to crack a joke about the holidays and make my family laugh. Someone (bless them!) came up with the idea of writing parodies of favorite holiday songs.

For the last several years, I’ve kept my radio on to Z100 and 95.5 WPLJ to tune into my favorites – Dominic the Italian Christmas Donkey, 12 Things at Christmas that’s Such a Pain to me and of course, Adam Sandler’s Hanukkah song (all three versions). Each year I look forward to singing these to make myself laugh. Sometimes, we can take the holidays so seriously that we fail to enjoy them. What better way to enjoy music during the holidays than to make fun of ourselves and share the laughter?